For
reasons I’d rather not go into now, this body of mine has suffered a lot, including
several major surgeries and lots of minor complications, all which have brought
about physical pain, and some of that physical pain continues to linger 20-30
years later.
I
remember one of my last stays in a hospital where I was in excruciating
physical pain. Part of the reason I was in such a high level of pain was because
of neglect by those attending to me. Let’s just say I wasn’t handling this in a
saintly way. In fact, my fiancée, Liz, was very surprised at how I spoke to the
nurse. I clearly would have handled the situation differently if I hadn’t been
experiencing such a high degree of pain.
But at
the same time, something needed to be said. I haven’t turned my life over to
the care of doctors, nurses, lawyers, etc., but to God. God has given me a
voice to articulate the knowledge that has been bestowed upon me. I knew that I
wasn’t getting the level of care I should have been getting and, if I had said
nothing, I would have been inviting not only the physical pain into my life,
but suffering as well. If I hadn’t said anything and just kept it in my head, I
would have suffered mental and emotional suffering, as well.
There
were times where there was absolutely nothing that could be done about the
physical pain I was in, so with as much grace and dignity as I could muster, I
tried to get through it.
Physical
pain is so hard to deal with, but all I can say to myself while I’m in it is
“Am I a part of the pain or part of the solution to remedy the pain?”
I look
forward to hearing from you about your experiences, strength and peace
surrounding this topic.
Namaste,
Michael
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