It's uncomfortable for you to wear clothes that no longer fit. On the other hand, trying to make others stay a certain way makes everyone uncomfortable. You can choose to try and prevent others from changing, but this will only result in pain for you. The alternative is to step back and watch the unfolding of that transformation. When you choose not to interfere with another person's growth, you are choosing to not give in to fear. Give your loved ones the space they need to grow.
Allowing others to have their own feelings is really about allowing yourself to have your own feelings. Giving others space is really allowing yourself space. God has given you space to transform, and this is called Free Will. When you make the decision not to interfere with the transformation of others, you become more aligned with God.
There is so much more around us than what we can see, feel, smell or touch. Love can be felt by other living entities, such as plants, but it cannot be seen. You can send forgiveness to others without communicating it verbally. The same applies to our primordial feelings. Just because we're not talking about those feelings does not mean that we're not sending out signals about them.
Focusing on what you can do to bring happiness to the world is much easier – and more productive – than focusing on what others are doing to foster unhappiness. I can now view those who bring unhappiness as teachers who are teaching me how not to do certain things. It can be challenging to see the big picture. Pray for those who are in so much pain that they have to cause pain for others. When it is in your power to effect change, do your best, and then let go of the results. Remember that God has forgiven you when you have caused unhappiness to others in the past.
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Mary Kelly says
Thank you for this, Michael. I’ve been ‘on edge’ for the past couple of days, frustrated with my husband, my kids, my parents. I keep wishing they were more, um, easy to be with. Your post made me realize that I just need to relax and allow them to be where they are at. I can just revel in the joy of the season and not allow their lack of joy to ruin it for me. Thanks, Ah-Man, your words always serve as a good reminder to stay centered.
Michael Hoare says
Thank you for being open and allowing yourself to connect to your heart. When we are connected, the whole world is more in alignment.
Michael